Andrea

by Annabelle Claudia Holland

Emily called me into her office. Nothing special there, of course. After all, she was my boss. In fact, she was everybody’s boss, for she owned the little company I worked for. There were only 12 of us in all, and the only thing that might have seemed slightly strange to anyone, was that I was the only male employee. I’m sure she wouldn’t have chosen me if she could have avoided it, but there aren’t many English people who can speak Hungarian. Somehow or other Emily had built up a Hungarian link, and, what with loads of European dosh sloshing around, she had needed someone who could speak the language. So there I was.

“Andrew, I was rather hoping you might be able to help us out next week. Nothing to do with Hungary, I’m afraid.”

I said I would be quite happy, whatever it was. Of course I would. I enjoyed working here. It was interesting work, which I thought myself lucky to have got, and I enjoyed working with only women. And there was enough spare time for me to indulge in my little hobby.

“The thing is, Hannah and I have to go to East Anglia next week. As you know, we’re try to catch a big fish there, so we’re going to have to be there all week. But we don’t want to lose track of what's going on at home base. What we really need is someone else to come along with us, to act as a personal assistant, you know, be on the end of a phone line to get back here and to use the net to keep things updated, or sort out any problems. Would you do that for us? There’s not much going on with Hungary at the moment, is there?”

I had to admit that there wasn’t. And, of course, a free week in, no doubt, an expensive hotel was no hardship, even if I was going to be little more than a secretary.

*****

That weekend I worried about how much I could risk taking with me. Of course I wanted to take lots of my favourite knick-knacks, but as ever I worried about being caught. But, surely in an expensive hotel chambermaids were taught to pay no attention to what their guests got up to.

“Gosh, anyone would think you were going on holiday, the amount of stuff you’ve got with you! This is work, you know!”

First mistake, I thought. Emily was suspicious about the size and weight of the suitcase I lowered into her Audi. “I thought it might be a good opportunity to brush up on some Hungarian, books and papers and stuff, that’s all.” I should have paid more attention to the winks Emily and Hannah shared.

The drive ahead of us was long and mostly cross-country. There was lots of time for Emily and Hannah to give me my instructions, about setting up a secure line back to work and about how to download and upload encrypted files. It was all a bit boring, and I got the feeling that they had their minds on something else. If only I had known.

*****

But was Hannah that broke the news. “You know, you’ve never told us your real name.” I was completely confused. What on earth was she talking about? And I said so.

“Don’t be so silly! Of course you must have another name. You must have another name, you know, one to go with pretty panties I’m sure you’re wearing. What colour are they today, by the way? Black? Pink? Red?”

If I had been driving then, the car would by now have crashed off the road. But Emily drove on serenely. I just had to bluster. Deny everything, as convincingly as I could. There was nothing else to do, was there?

“Just shut up, shut up! Otherwise we’ll throw you out of the car, you and your suitcase. It’ll be a shame if all those pretty clothes get scattered all over the road and then you have to bend down to pick them up, letting all the truck drivers get an eyeful of those panties! So, just shut up. You must think we’re stupid or you’re just crazy. There you are, working for a hi-tech company, and you go on the net, not just looking for pictures, but buying frilly clothes, lingerie, a corset or two, expensive boobs (we must be paying you too much!). Did you never realise that we’d find out. Ages ago, in fact. Would you like to see a record of all your transactions, I’ve got one here, if you’ve forgotten the details. And again, what’s your real name?”

I started pleading. “Please, Hannah, please Emily. I’m so sorry, I know I’ve betrayed your trust. I can’t begin to hope you’ll forgive me. And I know I’ll have to resign this instant. Just let me out, and I’ll disappear from your life. Please!”

It was Emily’s turn to humiliate me. She turned her head to look at me. “That won’t do. We need more than ‘sorry’ from you. We took you into this company, the only man we’ve ever employed, and now we look fools. Saying sorry doesn’t help. We need something better than that. And you haven't yet told us your real name!”

“Andrea,” I muttered, “it’s Andrea.”

“Well, Andrea, Emily and me are going to teach you a lesson you’ll never forget. Perhaps at the end of it you’ll know never to try and fool us again. Now, just shut up, don’t say another word. Otherwise you and your panties will be lying at the roadside. I promise you that. But we want to help you learn your lesson.” Hannah produced some sticking plaster and stuck it over my mouth. Then she bound my hands together with more plaster. “There, that will help you to shut up.”

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